Sunday Morning Sex

July 29, 2012 by 2 Comments

love-coupon-back-massage-sex-valentines-day-ecards-someecards

This post could very well go over like a lead balloon…….in my house. I am prepared for that. After all, it’s my brain that thought it up, and The Man knew full well what he was getting into 13 years ago. So there. I’m just banking on the fact that he doesn’t read my blog…lol.

And so I go on…..

It’s now, Sunday morning, and I’ve had a lot on my plate the past week or so. Haven’t been much ‘in the mood’. Lots of apologies….not excuses….just apologies, because I simply don’t have the energy. And maybe lack the motivation too. Honestly, those could be one in the same, as far as I’m concerned. I’m tired, my roots are gray, my bones hurt…‘bringing sexy back’ is not a priority. You get it.

But now it’s Sunday. And our usual, “let’s-feed-the-kids-early-breakfast, set-them-up with-cartoons-and-lock-the door-for-half-an-hour” is LOOMING. On one hand, I look forward to this ‘grown-up’ time, while on the other hand….I desperately want a back rub (with no groping). I honestly desire to please The Man, but really need to be cuddled and caressed, with no expectation. Of sex. Normally, I look forward to this Sunday morning date. Not so much tomorrow. WTF is wrong with me?

Did I mention that I got a job? Oh yeah…I did. Read about it here.

Anyway, I’d like some feedback. Does anyone out there have this issue? The Man chases you around during the week all the way through Saturday night, in anticipation of the “Sunday Morning Sex” with you thwarting the advances, not realizing he may get shut down in the morning? Sadly, this week, “the chase” in this household should really be an Olympic sport. The Man is on point with his game, and I should be fucking disqualified. Ugh.

Crap. What do I do? (if anyone says, “go to bed earlier” or “get more rest”…you’re fired as followers :-) Give me some insight. Seriously. Looking for ingredients to a spicy recipe people.

That said…I’m going to bed now.

xo,

N

Filed Under: just me, random thoughts

Mama to the rescue!!

July 17, 2012 by 7 Comments

Holy crap crackers! So much has happened since my last post, I don’t even know where to start.  And I thought this week was busy!

First of all, I forgot to tell y’all I was invited to be a contributor at MomsLA. How could I forget that? Well…it happened kinda fast, and amidst this. Nonetheless, it is a supercalifragilisticexpialidocious HONOR, in my opinion, and deserves special mention. The group of mommy bloggers they have assembled is spectacular, and I feel blessed to be included! If you would like to read my first post over there, which happens to be about my family’s participation in the making of the book trailer for the zombie thriller, “100 Days of Death”, click here 🙂

So.

As I mentioned, the first weekend in July, my family made a zombie movie. Not just me, mind you, but all of us. The Man and Middle Girl remained human, while I, The Oldest and Youngest got….zombified. I ran…A LOT…and eventually got shot in the head. Theatrically speaking, of course. The Man did what he does best (SOUND) while The Middle One acted like a frightened 8-year old when I attacked the car she was sitting in while The Oldest and Youngest made a feast out of the “prop” entrails of a friend. I know, Mother of the Year Nominations are being accepted, and I’m a shue-in based on allowing this alone…lol. Sounds like fun though, huh? Honestly, we had a blast, and aside from the possible therapy my girls may need later on, I can absolutely guarantee they will never be scared of any horror movies, monsters, or Halloween costumes for the remainder of their lives. They now know it’s a movie magic! 

Moving on….

While I wasn’t being all ‘undead’ and running from gun-weilding, leading men I was actually helping my sister, Shane, get her blog up and going. She is an even more talented writer than I, and she has stories to tell about our family that happened long before I was so much as a blip on the Romine Radar. There are some about me, and you can read those here and here. So, when you get a minute (or right now) hop over and see what she has to say. You won’t be sorry, I promise. Oh, and leave comments for her just like you do for me…she LOVES some feedback!

Oh and I got a job. A real one.

You are probably thinking….WTF? When does she have the freaking time?  Yeah, me too. But I am making time, and all I can say is that it was divine intervention. Won’t say anything more yet for fear of jinxing it. But I am very excited to have the opportunity and see where it goes 🙂 Of course, I am hoping for mad success, so say a little prayer for me.

And finally….just to make sure you realize there is NEVER A DULL MOMENT UP IN HERE…this past Saturday afternoon, while driving The Girls home from a trip to the local public library (because they were bored)…I rescued a red-eared slider turtle from the middle of the road. Yep. There he was, trying to cross the street a few blocks from my house and I stopped and picked him up. Since he is an almost entirely aquatic creature, I saved him from certain death in the heat we had that day, or more specifically, from being squashed like a bug by another car. Our first instinct was to put him in the pool when we got home and let him swim, because that’s what turtles like to do. And let me tell you…he was elated! However, I did a bit of research and discovered chlorinated water wasn’t good for him (shocker), so he spent the night in our bathtub. Then, yesterday after going both door to door asking if anyone had lost him and putting up “Found Turtle” signs–with zero response– I became worried that he wasn’t eating and decided we needed to consult with the experts (i.e. The Fish Cove, our local pet store specializing in aquatic creatures). They agreed to foster him for a few days while waiting to see if anyone claims him, as we are simply not equipped to properly care for him. I mean, we have a bearded dragon and a dog, but neither of them require almost constant submersion in water. So we are T-minus 2 days and counting until we must figure out the next move. In the meantime, we named him Bing.

That was my last 9 days. Oh, and during the composition of this post, I had to stop writing briefly because my washing machine flooded the laundry room and kitchen. Thank God I don’t sleep much now. Otherwise, it would have really made a mess! 

 So…whatcha got for me? Let’s hear it 🙂

N

Filed Under: blogger shout outs, family, funnies, just me, motherhood Tagged With: , , , , , ,

This rollercoaster belongs in a theme park.

July 3, 2012 by Leave a Comment

Looks pretty scary, huh?

Welcome to my point of view. Just a typical day in my life, recently.

As I mentioned here, life has been pretty nuts around the ole Calibama Ranch. And here’s the thing: it’s all family drama.  Okay, maybe not ALL of it.  But…whatever.

My struggle is with the fact that I built this family. Literally. Everyone knows each other because I packed my life up and drove to California 16 years ago. Might as well change my name to CATALYST, because that initial decision, followed by the marital union of The Man and me 3.5 years later, charted the life courses of no less than 8 people. Seriously. I’m not kidding, nor exaggerating. I’d list all the connections and such, but they aren’t my stories to tell and at the rate I’m going, I certainly can’t risk the shit getting any deeper up in here. Suffice to say, with the exception of one, who made the move here shortly after I did, and served a stint as my roommate for a bit in the early years…my closest girlfriends from college, are now family…for reals. Sister brought it full-circle, by leaving blood relation–complete with their own full-scale dramatic productions– behind in ‘Bama and creating my very own ‘friendamily’ here on the West Coast. It took me sixteen years…actually only thirteen to be exact…to do it, but masterpieces take time, right?

So.

Does that mean I’m responsible for this chaos? Please. Don’t. Answer. That.

At any rate, guilty or not, I have no regrets. None. Life has its highs and lows, peaks and valleys. Sometimes all in the same effing week. Even if the genie from Aladdin–complete with Robin Williams’ voice, a shiny gold lamp and a groovy magic carpet–suddenly appeared, offering me the opportunity to go back 13 years and do things differently, I wouldn’t. Every single introduction, experience, and life-altering event would remain intact, in its original, organic state. Honestly. Having all these people assembled together in my world interacting in such an amazing, tumultuous, meaningful way is a blessing, truly worth its weight in gold. Why, you ask?

Because I was given this life, and I appreciate every ounce of it.

Filed Under: family, just me, random thoughts Tagged With: , , , ,

Seriously Sucky Start to Summer Sabbatical

June 26, 2012 by 7 Comments

Honestly, this post was supposed to be about something else entirely.

That being, The Oldest Girl must attend summer school. Because she sucks ass at math, just like her mama. It’s not because she doesn’t try, it’s because she is entirely left-brained and creative, which severely impairs her ability to wrap her multi-faceted, artistically inspired mind around logical problems with finite answers. Go figure. She excels in EVERY OTHER SUBJECT, and barely passes math. Oh well. What’s a girl to do? I’ll tell you what. Drag her butt out of bed in time to BE AT SCHOOL, IN CLASS by…SEVEN-FREAKING-THIRTY, EVERYDAY for the first five weeks of summer vacation. Guess who has to drive her? Um…yeah. Me. With her complaining all the way there, and all the way back when I retrieve her two and a half hours later. You’d think she had done a stint in San Quentin.

Oh, the joys of motherhood. 

Anyway, that rant is what inspired the title of this little post.

Then lots of other shit happened, before I even wrote the first line. So I had to ‘save to draft’ with just a title, until now. Somehow, the title still seems appropriate, given the dichotomy of this past weekend. So.

We had both the incredibly joyous occasion of a birth happen in our family on Friday. (No..I didn’t give birth. My BFF did.)  Followed by the unexpected, tragic death of a beloved canine member of our immediate family on Saturday morning. 

I ask…WTF do you do with THAT?  Put on a brave face, and smile though your heart is shattered? Adding insult to injury, the circle of folks involved are all quite tight, so I had to break the news of Buster’s passing to my friend while she was still in the hospital, one day postpartum celebrating the best thing that has ever happened to her. Then, rush away to wrap my arms around my MIL and FIL, who are understandably inconsolable. To them, Buster was their child. And the grieving is just as intense.

One gorgeous, cuddly, innocent, perfect human child born, while another, equally gorgeous, cuddly, innocent, perfect canine companion is taken away. There simply is no justice in that. I’ve cried myself to sleep the past two nights, and so have The Man and The Girls. My eyes are puffy and red, and my head really hurts. Which come to think of it, may actually work in my favor this weekend while shooting a zombie movie. (more on that later)

But, here is the thing. Buster was majestic, respectful, obedient and never wanted anything more than to give everyone he met…human or animal…LOVE. And the only thing he sought in return was LOVE. He touched the lives of so many people in such a way that his memory will live in them for eternity. I believe he was given to all of us as a gift, a teacher, and when God believed his mission complete, he called him back home…without warning…

…and sent this precious angel baby in his place to remind us all to return to our true innocence and live our lives giving unconditional love always.  Who’s with me?

Anyway, I just needed to get that out. Hope you don’t mind.

I’m again, teary eyed and sleepy.

Night y’all,

N

Filed Under: family, just me, motherhood, random thoughts, rants and raves Tagged With: , , ,
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