Let it be known, that I didn’t like 5th grade homework when I was in 5th grade….and I still don’t. There is simply too much of it!! And what used to come so easy to me when I was young(er) and bright(er), is now rather difficult to wrap my mind around. When I am called to assist the Oldest Girl with the mounds of work due each day, I am reminded why I didn’t become a teacher, and I’m not afraid nor ashamed to admit that it’s because I SUCK AT IT!!!! That being said, we do get through the work. Eventually. But it’s not without me wanting to shout several times, at the very top of my volume capacity….. “YOU WILL NEVER NEED LONG DIVISION! LET’S GO GET ICE CREAM INSTEAD.”
Life summary
August 19, 2010 by Leave a Comment
Received an email from one of my sisters…I have 3….this morning. It made me smile all over my face, so I thought I’d share. Enjoy!
Great Truths Little Children Learn:
1. No matter how hard you try, you can’t baptize cats.
2. When your mom is mad at your dad, don’t let her brush your hair.
3. If your sibling hits you, don’t hit back. The second offender always gets caught.
4. Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5. You can’t trust dogs to watch your food.
6. Don’t sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7. Never hold a Dust Buster and a cat at the same time.
8. You can’t hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9. Don’t wear polka-dot underwear with white shorts.
10. The best place to be when you are sad is Grandma’s lap.
Great Truths Adults Learn:
1. Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2. Wrinkles don’t hurt.
3. Families are like fudge. Mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4. Today’s mighty oak is just yesterday’s nut that held its ground.
5. Laughing is good exercise. It’s like jogging on the inside.
6. Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
Great Truths About Growing Old:
1. Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is not.
2. Forget health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3. When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you’re down there.
4. You’re getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5. It’s frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6. Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.
7. Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
The Four Stages of Life:
1. You believe in Santa Claus.
2. You don’t believe in Santa Claus.
3. You are Santa Claus.
4. You look like Santa Claus.
Success:
At age 4, success is not piddling in your pants.
At age 12, success is having friends.
At age 17, success is having a driver’s license.
At age 35, success is having money.
At age 50, success is having money.
At age 70, success is having a driver’s license.
At age 75, success is having friends.
At age 80, success is not piddling in your pants.
Strawberry jam on sugar cubes
August 17, 2010 by 1 Comment
Yes, I am serious.
That is what I found The Beans eating, while left unattended for about 15 minutes today. mind you, Sugar Bean, being the oldest, should know better. Butter Bean is a follower, so not a surprise she joined in. Sweet Pea….well, she just blames the other two. I’d be lying if I said I am shocked. After all, 2 days ago one of them flat out refused to eat anything but a rice krispie treat for breakfast while the others had eggs and juice. So I did what most moms of 3 would do….I gave her big cup of milk to go with it.
I’ll give you a hint as to which one it was: she’s the creative, artistic genius who put this “maxi masterpiece” on my bathroom wall last year. It’s okay. I laughed like a hyena when I saw it too.
Really? Wow.
August 17, 2010 by 1 Comment
