Pajama Panic

Story of my life.

Story of my life.

Tomorrow is Pajama Day at The Girls’ school. It happens year after year, and inevitably, I experience the same freaking anxiety each and every time. Seriously. I need a mainline of Valium straight to my jugular in order to calm my neurotic ass down tonight.

While I should be excited that I don’t have to get them properly dressed in the morning, I am actually thinking…

“Fuck, fuck, double fuck! Who’s brilliant idea was THIS? He/she needs to be kicked out of the PTA.”

Why, you ask? Because my children wear the rattiest, most mismatched shit to sleep in you have ever laid eyes on. Comfy? Absolutely. Presentable to wear in public? Hell to the no! I have 3 girls, so pajamas are handed down and worn completely thread bare. Even MY pajamas are pathetic looking. Because nobody is actually supposed to see them. And I am horrified by the thought of my sweet angels being judged by their attire, and talked about in hushed tones by all the kiddos who probably have brand spanking new pj’s on tomorrow. Call me vain. Whatever. Kids are cruel. I know it, and so do you.

Nonetheless, I resisted the urge to run out today and purchase cool new pajamas for The Girls. That’s progress, right? Well don’t reward me yet, because I am seriously entertaining the possibility of letting them play hooky in favor of a Mommy/Daughters day complete with mani/pedis, or perhaps an educational outing to a museum or even a trip to the zoo.

Anything to avoid Pajama Day, for Pete’s sake. 






  1. This is very amusing. I love it! Why DO they have pajama day? Everyone knows it’s just another excuse for 6th grade mean girls to dress even more like little whores.

    • OMG. That is hilarious. Hadn’t thought about it like that. My 6th grader wore some plaid pj pants and an Alabama football shirt. Didn’t match at all. In fact, she sort of looked like she got dressed in the dark, just as the house caught fire. LOL. The little ones wore their ‘Sunday best’ pajamas.
      And in solidarity….I am still in mine 🙂

      • Good for you! Crisis averted AND you get to be in your PJs too.

        I wonder if the teacher’s union threatens to strike if they can’t come to work one day a year in the PJs?

      • Hmm…interesting thought. I wouldn’t know. Refer to the section in my latest post, about my impatience for teaching others 🙂

Give it to me straight. I can take it :-)

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