I now pronounce you “MAAH-WEED”.

Being goofballs as usual; Summer, 2006.

Being goofballs as usual; Summer, 2006.

On March 6, 1999,  The Man and I got married.  Or, “MAAH-WEED”, if you happen to be like me, and can’t utter that word without hearing the voice of Long Duck Dong saying it in Sixteen Candles–always a classic, favorite of ours.

Regardless, we’ve been hitched for 14 years, which means it’s actually the 2nd anniversary of the dreaded, “7-year itch”. Which, btw, never happened to us–at least not to me. Or to my knowledge. But second anniversaries are still technically the honeymoon phase, right? So with that in mind, I’ll just say it’s our second, so we can celebrate like newlyweds, and draw stares from people thinking, ‘look at those two…they need to get a room’…lol 🙂 Fifty more years, and we’ll reach the milestone my parents would have, if they were alive today. HOLY COW…in 50 years I’ll be 91. Am I really thinking about canoodling at that age?

Somebody freaking smack me, will ya?!!

All kidding aside, I treasure all the years we’ve earned, and moments we’ve shared together, including the awesome, the crappy, and the ‘WTF just happened’ ones. Marriage is a package deal. Reading between the lines of traditional matrimonial vows proves it. For better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health? Pretty strong evidence. If you’re really committed, it can be summed up with this statement, and you can move on to the reception: You get what you get, and you don’t pitch a fit. However, in the event you do toss caution to the wind, and throw a hissy….try not to go to bed mad. That’s the best piece of advice I can offer. Spending eternity with your soul mate can be hard work….but well worth the effort. Seriously.

Now. A tribute to THE MAN. 

The Top Ten Reasons A Divorce Lawyer Will Never Get My Our Money

1. The Man is frat-boy hot. In. Every. Way.

2. He understands that he lives with 4 females, and never leaves the seat up. Ever.

3. If one of The Beans is sick, The Man automatically takes the couch for the night (or the week), so she can sleep with me. Could be a selfish move, but still.

4. Despite, at first, saying the music was “kind of strange because of the violin”, he has become a diehard DMB fan, and completely understands that summer vacations must be planned around the tour schedule every year. It’s glorious. You can read about one of our adventures here. 

5.  He loves animals, and never scoffs when I announce it’s time to take in a new baby. In fact, at the moment, he wants a puppy. I do not.

6. When I said we needed to take the family on a 2000+ mile, cross-country road trip to Alabama, because I was homesick, he trusted me. Both times. 

7. The Man swears he’s Southern, attended the University of Alabama, and played football for my beloved Crimson Tide. He also claims we met there, and I just don’t remember. All lies. He was born and raised right here in Los Angeles.

8. Regardless of what I cook, it always ‘the best meal I’ve ever made’, and he thanks me for it. Even if it’s ramen noodles or delivery pizza.

9. There is never a shortage of cheesy jokes and silly nicknames for everyone and everything, because The Man’s cup runneth over with them. It’s both maddening and endearing simultaneously.

10. I know he loves me fiercely, without restraint or condition, and we have walked through Hell with each other to get where we are. Everyday, we choose to keep on going…with each other.

You can’t divorce that.

Happy Anniversary, dear. I love you.

Stolen moment; Street corner in Silver Lake; 2011.Photo-bomb by EZ-LUBE.

 

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Comments

  1. charlene says:

    Love this!!!So Sweet! Happy Anniversary!!! I vividly remember your glow and blessed to be a part of that moment!! Congratulations!!

  2. Happy anniversary you guys!

  3. awww….love this as I do everything you write. Happy Anniversary!!!

  4. That is so sweet. How you not adore and love a man like that. It’s good to hear that you are still in love after all these years. Happy Anniversary.

Give it to me straight. I can take it :-)

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