I now pronounce you “MAAH-WEED”.

Being goofballs as usual; Summer, 2006.

Being goofballs as usual; Summer, 2006.

On March 6, 1999,  The Man and I got married.  Or, “MAAH-WEED”, if you happen to be like me, and can’t utter that word without hearing the voice of Long Duck Dong saying it in Sixteen Candles–always a classic, favorite of ours.

Regardless, we’ve been hitched for 14 years, which means it’s actually the 2nd anniversary of the dreaded, “7-year itch”. Which, btw, never happened to us–at least not to me. Or to my knowledge. But second anniversaries are still technically the honeymoon phase, right? So with that in mind, I’ll just say it’s our second, so we can celebrate like newlyweds, and draw stares from people thinking, ‘look at those two…they need to get a room’…lol 🙂 Fifty more years, and we’ll reach the milestone my parents would have, if they were alive today. HOLY COW…in 50 years I’ll be 91. Am I really thinking about canoodling at that age?

Somebody freaking smack me, will ya?!!

All kidding aside, I treasure all the years we’ve earned, and moments we’ve shared together, including the awesome, the crappy, and the ‘WTF just happened’ ones. Marriage is a package deal. Reading between the lines of traditional matrimonial vows proves it. For better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health? Pretty strong evidence. If you’re really committed, it can be summed up with this statement, and you can move on to the reception: You get what you get, and you don’t pitch a fit. However, in the event you do toss caution to the wind, and throw a hissy….try not to go to bed mad. That’s the best piece of advice I can offer. Spending eternity with your soul mate can be hard work….but well worth the effort. Seriously.

Now. A tribute to THE MAN. 

The Top Ten Reasons A Divorce Lawyer Will Never Get My Our Money

1. The Man is frat-boy hot. In. Every. Way.

2. He understands that he lives with 4 females, and never leaves the seat up. Ever.

3. If one of The Beans is sick, The Man automatically takes the couch for the night (or the week), so she can sleep with me. Could be a selfish move, but still.

4. Despite, at first, saying the music was “kind of strange because of the violin”, he has become a diehard DMB fan, and completely understands that summer vacations must be planned around the tour schedule every year. It’s glorious. You can read about one of our adventures here. 

5.  He loves animals, and never scoffs when I announce it’s time to take in a new baby. In fact, at the moment, he wants a puppy. I do not.

6. When I said we needed to take the family on a 2000+ mile, cross-country road trip to Alabama, because I was homesick, he trusted me. Both times. 

7. The Man swears he’s Southern, attended the University of Alabama, and played football for my beloved Crimson Tide. He also claims we met there, and I just don’t remember. All lies. He was born and raised right here in Los Angeles.

8. Regardless of what I cook, it always ‘the best meal I’ve ever made’, and he thanks me for it. Even if it’s ramen noodles or delivery pizza.

9. There is never a shortage of cheesy jokes and silly nicknames for everyone and everything, because The Man’s cup runneth over with them. It’s both maddening and endearing simultaneously.

10. I know he loves me fiercely, without restraint or condition, and we have walked through Hell with each other to get where we are. Everyday, we choose to keep on going…with each other.

You can’t divorce that.

Happy Anniversary, dear. I love you.

Stolen moment; Street corner in Silver Lake; 2011.Photo-bomb by EZ-LUBE.

 

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Give this Southern girl some flowers…

…and THIS is what happens…

 

One guest said it was worthy of display in the lobby of The Four Seasons. I almost fainted.

It all started because we needed a centerpiece for the main table at the shower I co-hosted for my bestie yesterday. My go-to florist (and good friend) Kate, of Kate Baker Florals was out-of-town, and therefore, unable to take care of my bloomin’ needs, like she usually does. So, I was forced to take matters into my own hands. Why not go to another florist, you say? First of all, I’m very loyal when I find the best. That’s the truth. So I absolutely will continue to turn to her for my future events. After all, SHE’S the professional! However, I may or may not have waited ’til the last-minute and backed myself into a corner on this one, and I was desperate. But hey, that’s where my improvisation training comes in handy, right? “Flying by the seat of my pants” is practically an art form in my book 🙂

Since I had been to the Flower Mart in downtown LA once before, I knew where I needed to go. I also knew I had to get there early. As in, SIX IN THE MORNING. On Sunday. What I didn’t anticipate was that the ACTUAL Los Angeles Flower Mart being closed on Sundays. Nope, didn’t see that one coming. Never fear though, as there were some vendors open. I just had to walk a lot to get to them. I mean, from where I parked. Lol. That left me wandering around with people who either lived on those streets, or worked in the bloom business. I’ll be honest. Downtown LA can be, um…unsettling at that hour folks…especially when you are alone, have that “where the eff do I go now?” look on your face, and stick out like a sore thumb wearing yoga pants, and sporting a ponytail! Let’s just say I was very aware of my surroundings, and leave it at that.

Now, what does one who possesses ZERO formal knowledge about flowers do at the Flower Mart? Shop by color, of course. I designed the Evite, and planned to match that color scheme: teal, dark purple, dark blue and lime green. In addition, I wanted to use that mossy, hanging stuff the set designers used in the Twilight: Breaking Dawn wedding scene. Oh, and twisty brown twigs. Very Midsummer Night’s Dream. Guess you could say I had a vision. Oh, and the mossy, hanging stuff? I now know it is called Amaranthus, just in case you were wondering. And it comes in green and red. So this was a learning experience on several levels.

It took me all of 40 minutes to choose the perfect flowers, and hike back to the car. And bulk flowers are rather heavy, people. Didn’t know that either. My arms are still sore..lol. Nonetheless, I made it. By the time I got home and set up my makeshift floral studio on the patio (i.e. a wooden stool and our glass patio table) The Man and The Girls were just getting out of bed, and wandered out to see what I was working on. The Man said “OMG. Who did that?” To which I replied (after looking behind me) “What do you mean? Do you see a staff here helping? I DID IT!” To be fair, neither he nor I knew I had it in me, as this was a maiden voyage into the land of arranging petals, stems and leaves for me. We shared a laugh, he told me how proud he was of me, and my creativity, and he had never seen me attempt anything that hadn’t turned out exactly as I planned. Well, except that lemon icebox pie I attempted and failed at. Six. Different. Times. But I don’t bake. So, whatever.

After channeling my inner florist, and all was said and done, I designed a large arrangement for the main table (pictured above), and a smaller replica for the gift table, pictured below:

Gift table

Gift table

The celebration was spectacular! Just what the mommy-to-be wanted. A big thanks goes out to my co-hostess, Heidi. She was feeling a little under the weather, but you never would have known, as she was the picture of elegance and hostess-with-the mostess. Hung in there like a trooper! I see sainthood in her future. 🙂 While I took care of the flowers, games and prizes, Heidi took care of the favors, and arranged the venue/food with her friend Bibo Mohamed, a supervisor at Coupa Cafe in Beverly Hills. A big shout out goes to him, and the owner, Camelia Coupal! The set-up was perfect, the food delicious, and the service was impeccable, thanks to the fabulous staff. If you live in the LA area, enjoy Venezuelan cuisine, and have the opportunity to visit this wonderful restaurant, you will definitely not be disappointed! And request Sarah. She’s was our server, and is a complete doll. 🙂

All in all, the day was a glorious success, from very early start to finish. I found a new creative outlet, and learned a few things about flowers. The gorgeous mama was showered with lots of love and positive energy, which is so important when you feel like there is an alien inside you lying on your bladder, kicking your ribs, and making you crave strange foods that give you heartburn immediately after eating them. She can rest easy knowing she has all the things she needs now. And The Man and I have a new restaurant to visit on our next date night. Now, if that baby will just hurry up and get here so we can get a formal introduction and shower him with hugs and kisses, life will be perfect. 🙂

xo,

N

The table set-up before everyone arrived.

The table set-up before everyone arrived.

 

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