After two days of crying because of this, I was due a day of smiling, and some gut-busting laughter. That opportunity came today, after I picked The Beans up from school.
Every Thursday is ‘banking day’. Which roughly translates into ‘an excuse for our school district to make you pick your kid up early‘, I believe. I could be wrong, though. It’s happened before…on occasion. Anyway, because they get sprung early, we’ve made a sort of ritual out of the afternoons by going to Fro-Yo immediately after school. They get a treat before starting homework, I get to ‘check in’ on Facebook from somewhere besides my living room, so people think I have a life. It’s a win-win.
Well, today was an extra special treat.
On the way to Fro-Yo, we were listening to Radio Disney. Not such a strange thing, except today I was driving The Man’s car, and he doesn’t have the fancy-schmancy XM Satellite radio like my mom-mobile does. The music was coming through on AM1110, an AM station…complete with static. The hilarity ensued when….
Butter Bean asked, “What’s that noise, Mommy?” I reply, “That’s the radio, sweetie.” Sugar Bean chimes in with “You know, it’s the satellite causing the static.” Immediately, I correct her and say, “No, this car doesn’t have XM. The music is coming through on an AM station, and they can be static-y”. With that, Sugar Bean says “It figures. Why is this station even on right now? I mean, it’s an AM STATION. Don’t they only come on in the morning?” She said it with just enough certainty, there was no doubt she really believed it.
I almost peed my pants and crashed the car simultaneously, because I was laughing so hard. Seriously. Did my kid just say that? It was gooood, people. Priceless, in fact. I needed to tell someone right then. So I called my sister. Both because I knew she would laugh her ass off with me, and also because she raised 2 daughters who had ‘those’ moments too, and wouldn’t think I had birthed a child whom I believe is quite smart, only to discover she the village idiot at the ripe old age of 12. The Man was at work, and unreachable, so sharing this bit of comedy with him was out of the question
My sister reminded me of a conversation, that took place between my niece and I, while I was home visiting with Sugar Bean, who was only a year old, circa 2000. Meaghan was 15 or so, and I was 29. We were hanging out discussing the fact that she was the hardest person in the world to get out of bed for school every morning, despite the obnoxious alarm clock she owned. Her alarm clock would wake the entire house, by blasting the Nickelodeon jingle “Nick, nick, nick, nick, na-nick, nick, nick….NICKELODEON!!!” at a decibel level that may not even be legal. They lived in rural Alabama, in a fairly large house and Meaghan’s room was upstairs. Everyone who slept downstairs could hear it. Their house sat on 110 acres, and their neighbors could hear it. Despite it being on her nightstand; she never stirred. Never hit the snooze button, if it even had one. And no, she isn’t deaf. Shocking, I know. Each morning started with someone else barging into her room, banging on the alarm clock until it shut up, and literally dragging her out of bed. Every. Morning.
Anyway, as I was complaining about the alarm clock waking the baby up every morning, she rebutted by saying, “Hey now. I love that clock. It’s a really good one. I’ve had it since I was in the 4th grade, and never once had to replace the batteries.” As I sat in complete disbelief, I calmly said “Meaghan. Does it plug into the wall??” “Uh-huh,” she replied, smiling at me with her big blue eyes wide open. I just shook my head and said, “It’s electric, Blondie.” We both erupted in laughter, and I’m pretty sure I wet my pants. The laugh was absolutely worth it.