Lots of irons in the fire, folks!

You know how I’m always saying I wear eleventy jillion hats? Figuratively speaking, that is. I think it’s reached a fever pitch now, y’all. So I’m about to list ’em for you, and then ask a favor. You knew that was coming right? Of course you did. Because y’all are fancy schmancy mind reading followers.

1. Full-time, mom

Lots of people would just stop here. After all, it’s a 24/7 PLUS job. Especially with The Beans. Which is why it’s listed FIRST.

2. Creator, Co-Producer and actress for THE BAR, a new comedy web-series coming soon from Bless Her Heart Productions.  

Trust me. You wanna know more. And you’ll want to get in on the action. Now, watch this.

3. Stella & Dot  jewelry stylist 

Oh, and I just promoted to Lead Stylist, which means I have people under me now. Wanna have a Trunk Show?

4. Kitten mom.

Let it be known, I didn’t intend to have a cat. But it was destiny. His mama abandoned him, and I took over when he was a day old. Round the clock bottle feedings…keeping him clean and safe…basically like having a newborn. Of course, I wouldn’t know anything about THAT. We named him Hiccup and he is almost 7 weeks old now. Eating food on his own, potty-trained, getting into mischief. I guess he’s a toddler now? Regardless, he’s the cutest. cat. ever.

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5. Mixologist/Bartender at one of our favorite local spots. 

This was an accident. I swear. But I’m gonna roll with it, okay? You should too.

6. Volunteer at our church. 

God called, and I need to make sure my ticket to Heaven is punched. Enough said.

7. Blogger 

This is no surprise. I mean, you wouldn’t be reading right now if I stopped wearing this hat. But, recently I’ve been doing more posts like this onethis one, and this one.  Oh, and this!!  So I think it’s kind of a big deal.

Since seven IS a lucky number, I’m cool with it. That is, until somebody hands me NUMBER EIGHT. Because I simply don’t see the line most people believe exists somewhere between ‘overextending yourself’ and ‘why-can’t-I-say-no-insanity’. Yeah, that.

Anyway, remember when I said I needed a favor? Well… here it is. I want y’all to help me with #2. Oh, stop snickering like Beavis and Butthead.  I’m serious. Please consider donating to the Indiegogo campaign for THE BAR. We have the best ensemble cast ever, and it’s hilarious. Not to mention there are some serious, tangible perks to donating! Every penny counts y’all and we’ve got a long way to go and a short time to get there (See what I just did? Do you recognize that line from the title song of another iconic Southern film? Hint: Smokey).  It’s my baby, and I really wanna see it blossom. But if you can’t donate, I totally understand. You can still SHARE THE LINK TO THE CAMPAIGN WITH EVERYONE YOU’VE EVER MET. Or share this post you are reading. Or even better… BOTH!

 Love y’all. Have a great weekend 🙂

Put it in the universe.

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I was going to wait until tomorrow to jump back up on the blogging horse, but then something happened in the car today that reminded me of happy times, prompting me to start early.

So here I am.

You are likely wondering why these pictures are leading this post, right? Or not….but I’m going to tell you anyway.

The first thing to know (if you don’t already) is I put the ‘fan’ in FANactic when it comes to all things associated with the Dave Matthews Band. I’ve been a stalker fan since they’ve been a band (1991), and have attended an obscene number of shows. There are some very uncanny coincidences associated with my love for all things DMB.

~~ Dave and I were both born on January 9th, although he is 5 years my senior.

~~ He has a song titled “Dancing Nancies” which I used to think was about me, until I read somewhere that it’s about male transvestites in the Red Light District in Amsterdam.

~~ His charity organization is called “The Bama Rags Foundation”. I’m from Alabama, but he is not.

~~ My first choice for college was a small, private liberal arts college in Virginia called Sweet Briar College. I applied and got in, but couldn’t afford to go, and instead accepted a scholarship to the University of Alabama. Dave met his wife at Sweet Briar College.

~~ I haven’t missed a tour since they started doing them, and often attend concerts alone if The Man is busy and I can’t find a running mate.

~~ When I turned 30, I said to The Man, “On my 35th birthday, if we have more money than we know what to do with, will you please hire Dave to play at ‘our’ party?”  He said, “Of course, Baby Girl.”  **Side note: I did end up meeting Dave, but it wasn’t because The Man hired him, and he wasn’t playing at our birthday party…lol. Through a strange twist of fate, a dear friend was able to hook me up with a gig working as an extra on the single episode of “House” Dave played a role on, and ironically enough…we taped the day after I turned 35. I made sure to introduce myself, even at the risk of being tossed off the set. He knew exactly who I was (apparently he’d been told I would be there?) and wished me a happy belated birthday.

Anyway, the pics above were from the 2nd crazy coincidental meeting we had. Below are a few facts leading up to these photos:

1. These pics were taken in 2007, on Sugar Bean’s 8th Birthday at Verizon Wireless Amphitheater in Irvine, CA.

2. About 3 weeks before these were snapped, a publicist friend of mine who knows of my obsession, called and said he was having brunch with another friend who used to be Dave’s publicist, and wondered which show in LA I was attending on that tour, in case she still had connections and could set up a meet and greet. I told him the show in Irvine, because Sugar Bean was going with me as her birthday present. Unfortunately, he called a few days later and said she no longer had an “in”. No worries.

3. Exactly 2 days before the concert, while I was in hellish traffic on the 405, my cell phone rang. I answered, and a girl named Lauren said she was calling from “The Warehouse” (the official DMB fan club…which I am a member of) and wondered if I was attending the show in Irvine later that week. I told her I was planning on it, and then she asked if I would like to meet Dave before the show. I think I muttered something to the effect of “Oh holy hell…did Alfred put you up to this?”  She said she didn’t know an Alfred, but my name had been randomly selected by the fan club as the winner of a pre-concert “meet & greet”…for reals. I continued to grill her, until I was satisfied I wasn’t being Punk’d, and promptly wet my pants, grinning from ear to ear all the way home. YES. THAT REALLY HAPPENED.

4. I took that t-shirt away from her once we got home and promptly stored it in an air-tight container. It’s never been washed and she will only get it back at my death.

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How about that grin???

Proof positive that it pays to put things into the universe if you REALLY want them to happen, huh?

Now…why am I telling you all this? Because I want to. And because it’s relevant to the happy time I was reminded of today in the car.

Each time I gave birth, I was listening to music through headphones. Guess what artist was playing? If you answered “Dave Matthews” you win a gold star! Now, in fairness to each individual life I brought into the world and because each of the The Beans has her own unique personality. Despite the fact, I didn’t know what each bundle of joy would be like once she was born, I chose a different song for each one, and put that on repeat until they entered the world. They all know what their song is, both by name and when they hear it, as well as what their sisters’ songs are. Call me crazy, but it’s an important detail in my estimation.

Sugar Bean’s song is ‘Jimi Thing’, Butter Bean’s is ‘Trippin Billies’ and Sweet Pea’s is ‘Rapunzel’. Of course these are also 3 of my all-time faves, hence why I chose them 🙂

Anyway, today when I picked Butter Bean and Sweet Pea up from school, ‘Jimi Thing’ was playing on the stereo, and was quickly identified by Butter Bean as Sugar Bean’s song. Oh, and if you are wondering if I’m “that mom” who rocks out with the windows down while in carpool line….I TOTALLY AM. Wouldn’t have it any other way. But I digress. Back to the conversation that ensued:

BB: This is SB’s song!!

Me: Yes…it is 🙂

SP: What’s my song again?

BB: Rapunzel

SP: Right! Now what is that song about? Princess Rapunzel, or another Rapunzel?

BB: Mama, what’s it about?

Me: Oh…I’m sure it’s about Princess Rapunzel (smiling devilishly).

Thank God they didn’t inquire about the meaning behind ‘Jimi Thing’, right? 

 

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What’s In My Purse?

So…in lieu of my somewhat usual, “It’s Friday…For Real” video blog, I decided to post something equally intriguing.

I hope.

The thing is, I’m battling bronchitis, which kind of makes me sound like Froggy when I talk, so I really didn’t want to be on film. And that’s just my voice. Haven’t been sleeping well…so…you know, I’ve got the next trendy line of dark-colored, luggage hanging under my eyes.  Call me vain. Whatever. Back to my purse. Which, speaks VOLUMES about a lady, right?

Here’s the photo. I’m gonna list the items, but it’s up to you to play “I SPY” and spot them, because I don’t have the slightest clue how to add arrows and labels and all the other stuff on top of the picture to make it look really cool.

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In no particular order….

1. Star Student Report for one of The Beans. This is to let me know she can read, write and compute numbers as well as, if not better than the other students who took the test. I don’t put much stock in these reports. My kids are bright, and happy.

2. The Warehouse envelope my DMB tickets arrived in 2 weeks ago. Haven’t posted about the concert yet. I’ll get to it. Promise.

3. An appointment card for The Beans for their next dentist visit….in 6 months. They just went yesterday, so the card has not yet been lost.

4. A really long ass receipt from CVS. 3 items bought. Lots of coupons…I WILL NEVER USE, because I will forget I have them.

5. Multiple pens & a Sharpie. If this needs an explanation, you either don’t have kids or don’t live in LA. God Bless You 🙂

6.  A Gerber camping knife. Goes everywhere with me, and I can open it with one hand. Comes in handy more often than you think, and solicits very quizzical looks from the other moms when I whip it out after someone asks for scissors at a PTA meeting.

7. My cobalt blue Stella & Dot Tech Wallet. I LOVE THIS. You should get one….here.

8. A black headband…because you just never know when you’ll need to pull your hair off your forehead, revealing some wrinkles. Seriously.

9. A Stella & Dot look book. What? I’m a stylist, and I like to book and sell on the go 🙂

10. My keys. Pretty self-explanatory, right?

11. A zippered, fabric pouch/coin purse. I may or may not have stolen this from one of The Beans. It holds metal money nicely, and LA is full of parking meters.

12. Various coupons for sandwiches at different places. Maybe I will remember I have them one day when I’m hungry. Who knows?

13. Union Square Scarf in Midnight Bloom from Stella & Dot. I adore scarves. They are the PERFECT accessory. If I don’t have one on, there is usually one in my bag. Honestly, I feel naked without them.

14. Residual checks from SAG-AFTRA. One belongs to Butter Bean, who said the F-word in a movie 3 years ago, and the other belongs to me for voice-over work on a TV show. Mine is for $0.03, after taxes. Hers is exponentially larger.

15. A red, “wallet” thingy that holds important papers. It should be in a safe deposit box somewhere, probably. Although I think the only thing in it now is my marriage certificate? Don’t ask.

16. A slip from the USPS to pick up a letter. Funny thing is, they are supposed to knock on your door to try to deliver it first. Didn’t happen. I was home all day. Postman was apparently too busy to climb the driveway to the door. Hmmm….

17. My Passport. Because you just never know when you may need to hop a flight and skip town, right?

18. A 4-leafed clover I found in Toronto the last time I visited. I have a gift for finding them, but this is the only one I’ve ever found in another country 🙂

19. Mini-look books from Stella & Dot. See #8 above.

20. My actual “How Does She Do It”  bag from Stella & Dot. Have you still not checked out the line? Shame on you!

21. An Epi-pen. Because I am allergic to a lot of shit. Mostly pain killers and antibiotics, but still. You can never be too careful.

22. Various receipts tucked inside a small journal. I have a crappy filing system and I like to write stuff down when it pops in my head. What can I say? There may be a method to my madness…

23. A book of sticky notes. My upline, S &D sponsor, Heather, gave this to me when I went to Vegas for HOOPLA. It’s been in my bag since, and I’ve used it many times for lots of stuff. So it stays.

24. The metallic pouf that matches my bag. Wouldn’t you like to know what’s INSIDE? Um…no.

25. Tiny hair clips. I’m letting my bangs grow out, so I usually need something to clip them back with. Just got a new pack, and decided my purse was the safest place for them, since I have 3 young girls who live with me, and are always in search of hair accessories. And they have been known to bring home lice from school. Just sayin’….

26. A prescription bottle. Enough said.

27. A rat-tail comb. It gets tangles out. Not without a fair amount of screaming though. You’ve been warned.

28. Notes on a script I am now collaborating on. When it’s done, I’ll let you know 🙂

 

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Wisdom from a cookie

I really love fortune cookies.

I really love fortune cookies.

The Beans and I have begun a tradition…of sorts. On Friday nights, we go and have sushi (bank account willing, of course) at our favorite spot. Often, it’s just us girls, as The Man is usually working…to pay the bill…lol 🙂 No matter what everybody orders, the meal always ends with the same thing: FORTUNE COOKIES. Truth be told, it’s my favorite part, but I rarely give the little slips of paper much thought after reading them. Unless we happen to be blessed with pearls of knowledge that look like the ones above.

These were our fortunes one of the last time we went to Zen, a favorite spot. Gotta love a restaurant with that name, right? I was so impressed by the treasure trove of wisdom, I snapped a picture. And now I’m writing about what each statement means in reference to the one who pulled it from its crescent-shaped cookie.

 

It’s important to you that money not be important. 

This was mine, and it couldn’t be more true. Personally, I would prefer returning to the days of bartering for goods and services. Money fuels too much of our lives, and I can’t stand being dependent upon it. If there’s not enough, people are unhappy. If there’s too much, people are unhappy. Where is the balance? There isn’t one, as far as I can see. Money can’t buy happiness. Sure, it can serve as a band-aid for a much deeper seeded issue. But at the end of the day, the wound is still there, festering underneath.  Honestly, I believe my family is better off without an abundance of the nation’s currency. That being said, if I won the lottery…I’d cash the check. And go eat sushi.

It’s time you asked that special someone out on a date.

Sugar Bean pulled this one. Still scratching my head over what it’s meaning could be. Seriously…she’s fourteen. She can’t date. Hell, I don’t even allow her to wear makeup to school. Apparently, this one needs some time to reach its full potential. Three years sounds about right, don’t ya think?

If you have knowledge, let others light their candles by it.

Since this one belonged to Butter Bean, I can only assume it’s a reference to the fact that she’s our family’s math whiz. On several occasions during the last school year, she actually helped Sugar Bean with her math homework. She was in third grade, and SB was in seventh. Therefore, Butter Bean kept SB’s candle lit by sharing her mathematical genius! Thus, saving SB’s butt from being grounded under less than favorable math grades. Go figure.

It’s not the plan that is important, it’s the planning.

Ahh….Sweet Pea….my planner. Always coming up with elaborate schemes and agendas from the depths of her imagination. She makes calendars, books, drawings, etc….all depicting grand plans for us and her friends. And it keeps her occupied for hours. Which gives mama time to clean house, workwrite or play on Facebook. Yes, it’s all in the planning 🙂

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