It’s Friday…For Real: Episode 2

Hi y’all…Hope everyone had a fabulous Fourth of July! I know we did. Now, if you are anything like The Man, you probably had some mishaps with food. Specifically, wearing it…after eating and enjoying it. If so, you’re gonna want to pay close attention to the second episode of

It’s Friday…For Real!

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I’m officially 20 days late….

….announcing that I’m a PUBLISHED AUTHOR folks.

Isn't it pretty?

Isn’t it pretty?

What? You thought I was late? As in preggo? BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.NO. That ship has officially  docked sunk. Unless God suddenly decides he needs another earthly being to bear offspring. And then I will still be on my knees praying he doesn’t like petite women, brunettes, moms who blog and swear, women who wear cowboy boots or females named Nancy. You get the point.

Anyway, what I’m actually talking about is my contribution to the ridiculously funny collection of stories, titled Parenting Gag Reel: Hilarious Writes and Wrongs, Take 26  published by Life Well Blogged. The book was released on on April 2nd, which was the official day I became a contributing author to an E-book, hence the 20 days late reference. In case you’ve lost your calendar wits…today is April 22nd 🙂 But…the fantastic duo of Abbey Fatica and  Monica Merrill-Mylet took it one step further…and the book is now available in PAPERBACK at CreateSpace  (hint, hint…I can autograph those puppies for ya!)  So, go there now and buy one. I’m begging. Pretty please…with some homemade, iron-skillet baked, cornbread on top? We’ll work out the logistics of cornbread delivery & autographing later. Promise.  

Oh, and the BEST part is.…a portion of the proceeds from the sales of Parenting Gag Reel will benefit Autism Speaks, an amazing charity helping children and families dealing with autism everyday. And if there is one thing y’all know about me…I am all about helping others. It is one of my callings in life, I believe. Besides making people laugh, and feel better about their own parenting skills by injecting humor into the obvious, epic failures in my repertoire.

Last but not least….One of the other contributors, the wonderful Kristi from reached out to the rest of us contributors with a very personal plea in hopes for the successful sale of the book. I would like to pass that along now:

It’s so exciting to see people talking about this hilarious book, isn’t it?  Abbey has been kind enough to offer to donate a portion of the proceeds of each book sold to a fundraiser that we’re doing for my son’s Preschool Autism Class.  Other parents and I have been searching for ways to help my son and his classmates.  Through our research, we’ve learned that iPads significantly help children on the autism spectrum learn how to learn and even communicate.  

We’re holding a multi-family garage sale at the end of April and all proceeds will go toward the purchase of an iPad (or, if we get enough, 2 iPads as there are 2 PAC classrooms).  With Abbey’s help, and yours, maybe we’ll be able to get a little closer to our goal.  In order to get credit for the sale, people will have to purchase the book through the following link or through my site:

Thank you so much!

So my desire for you to buy the book because I’m a contributor, and there’s a really funny story about Sweet Pea peeing in public in there, actually pales in comparison to my wish that you buy it to help Kristi’s precious son. At this point, I’m just honored to have been chosen as a contributing author!
BTW…I’m featured in Chapter….well, I guess you’ll
just have to buy it I guess, won’t you? 
Once you do, please share the news with friends via FB and Twitter, read/rate reviews —4 or 5 stars are preferred, but don’t lie–
and leave one of your own about what you thought on Amazon!
Oh…and FYI–glowing reviews help boost sales if you were


***Or, you could always hop over to my Facebook page“Like” it (if you haven’t already) and leave a comment THERE with the name of the Bean who is featured in the essay published in the book. You see, I have 5 copies of the Ebook to GIVE AWAY, and I’d love for you to enter the contest. Winner will be chosen at random, and notified via email, after the contest closes on April 30th***

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BEE ‘Like’ Us….and get cool swag :-)

It’s no secret, I have some beautiful, amazingly talented, cool friends, right? I mean, not too long ago one of my ‘hooker’ friends styled me for an awards shindig. If you haven’t already, you can read about that here.  Super exciting, I must say!

Now, I’m about to introduce y’all to the ladies of Blue Eyed Entertainment

(from left to right)

• Asia DeMarcos – On-air and Publicity Coach​

• Diana Becerra Franco – Social Media Guru​

• Kit Wallace  (Owner)– Public Relations, Marketing and Branding Expert​​

• Catie Bellinger – Event Specialist ​

Umm...who WOULDN't want them as friends?

Umm…who WOULDN’t want them as friends?

In addition to being a stunningly gorgeous group of women, they also run a kick-ass,  full-service, PR/Marketing and Event Planning company…and all happen to be friends of mine in real life {squeal}. They scratch my back, I scratch theirs. It’s the way of Hollywood, and an absolute win-win 🙂

FOR EVERYONE. Including y’all now.

BEE-ing an honorary staff member, I have been given the unique opportunity to offer A GIVEAWAY!!! Yes, that’s right…


(well, there are a couple of hoops to jump through, but they’re easy peasey lemon squeezy)

To be entered to win a fabulous swag bag full of stuff for you and your munchkins, just like the one in the picture below, which includes:



MD SolarSciences Beach Bag
10 % discount for Marnie Goodfriend Photography
$25 Gift Card to Target***
30 minutes free at Sky Zone
Toy Story 3 Bubble Set
Pin wheel

In order to be entered to win, you’ll need to do the following two things:

1. Go the the Blue Eyed Entertainment Facebook Page and LIKE it. 

2. Leave a comment on the page saying ” The Calibamamom sent me.” 

As soon as the page reaches 650 LIKES, the contest closes. From the comments that mention The Calibamamom, a winner will be chosen at random, and notified by the beautiful ladies of Blue Eyed Entertainment.



***The ladies at BEE decided to replace the small stuffed toy originally listed for the giveaway (and shown in the photo) with a $25 Target Gift Card so your child can choose a toy of their choice!! 

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The very first sleepover

The first sleepover has happened.

That is, with Sweet Pea and one of her 2 BFF’s. Who, btw, will be referred to throughout the remainder of the post as “J” 🙂 And in honor of the momentous occasion…a first sleepover for two 6-year-old besties…. I planned a girlie adventure, and set the bar kinda high. Shocker, huh? I settled upon a trip to a little girls’ paradise. Stay with me. I swear I’ll get to the details (and pictures), but first I have to tell you about what happened on the way over the hill.


(a bit of expository information ) 

The room Butter Bean and Sweet Pea share is a source of frustration. I can’t keep it clean and organized, and they won’t. Therefore, it is, quite honestly…the bane of my existence….on a daily basis. So I normally just leave it alone to avoid going bat-shit crazy. However, if company is coming over, I spit shine the entire house. Including their room. I imagine that most of you do the same with guests approaching the doorstep, right? If you don’t, you either have a housekeeper, or you’ve achieved a level of “I don’t give a rat’s ass” that I aspire to. Regardless, in my Friday morning, mad dash to clean shit stuff up, I happened upon a scrap of paper in their room upon which the sentence “I love ____” was written about six times. In a row, in Sweet Pea’s 1st grade handwriting. There was a name in the blank, but I’ve left it out to protect the innocent…lol. Anyway, I sort of giggled at the discovery, left it where I found it, and moved onto the organization of doll clothes and barbies into designated wooden bins.


Then, on the way to The Grove, this conversation happened:

J: I wonder where _____ lives? 

SP: I don’t know.

Me: Who’s ____? (knowing full well who it is, because I have seen this little boy’s name written 3 hours earlier)

J: He’s a boy in our class.

SP: (giggling, but remaining silent)

Me: Oh. Who likes him?

J: I do. And so does SP.

SP: So does ___!!! (insert name of the other BFF who isn’t present)

Me: Wow. He’s popular! Why do all of you like him?

J: Because he’s hot!!! Except for that tooth. Something needs to be done about that.  

Me: What??!!

J and SP, in unison: He has one tooth that is really big.

J: And kind of crooked.

SP: And he’s eight.

(giggles all around, including me–because I simply can’t believe what I am hearing)

Remember, they are six years old, so it’s all incredibly innocent, and cute, but the magnitude of their observation is not lost on me. 

With this, Sugar Bean, in her infinite, 13 year-old wisdom says “This is going to be a problem in about 7 years.”  I should add, that Butter Bean has remained silent the entire time, and I am waiting for her bombshell, which never comes. *whew* Not sure I could take much more, quite honestly. The conversation ends as a One Direction song comes on, and I am subjected to “road trip karaoke” for the next half hour. Swimming in a sea of awesome, right?

A view from the front seat.

A view from the front seat.

The good news is, we made it to our destination, which was The American Girl Store, where we had an appointment to have Savannah’s, Lauren’s, and Sally’s hair done. Before you ask….yes. They have an in-store salon for such affairs, and you can pick the hairstyle you want from a page full of possibilities, priced according to the complexity. Just like in real-life. If you want highlights, you gotta pay. The prices max out at $20, which is a far cry from what I fork over when my roots shine through, but still. I am not a doll. So, here is a glimpse of what it looks like. Notice SP’s doll…Savannah…sitting in the chair behind them 🙂

Sweet Pea & J, in front of the  AG  Hair Salon

Sweet Pea & J, in front of the AG Hair Salon

While the dolls were being treated to hair makeovers, we  I decided to explore the store, and take advantage of a photo-op spot inside, and outside 🙂

J, BB and SP with "Saige"...AG's Girl of the Year.

J, BB and SP with “Saige”…AG’s Girl of the Year.


Dolls with cool hairstyles? Check. Cool outfits for dolls? Check. Let's roll.

Dolls with cool hairstyles? Check. Cool outfits for dolls? Check. Let’s roll.


After looking at every possible corner of the store, we picked up the dolls and headed out the door and across the street to our next destination….

If you live in LA, and you haven't been, you suck. Seriously. Go there now.

If you live in LA and haven’t been, you have no soul. No excuses. Go there. NOW.

Honestly, I never order dessert, hate chocolate, and avoid sugar like it’s acid. Not because I fear weight gain, or cancer, or any of the other effects said to be the result of too much sugar…but simply because I am not a sweet eater. My taste buds just prefer sour or salty. However, I do appreciate a good candy store, and holy hell….DYLAN’S is the very best one I’ve ever visited. The candy in there could have been laced with crack and I would have bought it for The Beans  (plus one), simply because of the way it was displayed. And the background music was a remix of the theme from “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” AND “Ice cream and Cake and Cake”. Talk about suggestive marketing. Screw subliminal…Dylan has it going on, and I’m certain he knows it.

Look beyond the adorable little girls, into the mecca of sugar heaven.

Look beyond the adorable little girls, into the mecca of sugar heaven.

Bags of candy in hand…and a call to The Man to see if he was gonna meet us (NO)…and we decided it was time to eat, for real. So, this was the scene at dinner:

Obviously, I couldn't be IN the picture, but I was honored to have these cuties as dinner companions.

Obviously, I couldn’t be IN the picture, but I was honored to have these cuties as dinner companions.

Major props to our waiter, Michael, for enduring the high intensity sugar-rush that took over immediately after their food was consumed. I really hope the tip was enough 🙂

The ride home was priceless. More road trip karaoke involving “Trouble” by Taylor Swift, which Sugar Bean managed to record on her phone, but I can’t figure out how to upload for your enjoyment. Major fail, I know. My apologies. But the night continued to be a party. Fingernails were painted, popcorn was popped, movies were watched, farting noises with a strategically placed straw in an armpit resonated at unnatural volumes(gee…I wonder who taught them THAT?).

And then came bedtime, which got off to a fantastic start, and ended with me making the 10 minute drive  to her house, with a tearful J at 12:30 am. Bless her heart, she fought the good fight, and wanted to stay, but just wasn’t comfortable.  I totally get it. First sleepovers are scary at six.

Wait..who am I kidding? First sleepovers are scary. Period.

But there is always next time 🙂

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